We have all been there. The other day I was having a conversation about keeping versus throwing away the gifts your EX partner gave you once. My friend was telling me how she went into the ‘rage mode’ and broke every single thing which was somehow related to her ex boyfriend. I thought it is a little bit extreme and was shocked to even make a comment on this sort of action. I never got rid of the things that my ex lover, boyfriend or one month fling so nicely awarded me with. To be honest, most of the clothes are hanged in the closet waiting to be sold on Ebay because I have never really liked them anyway. Lace bodycon dress was a real miss but to please my boyfriend I wore it on the valentine’s day. Now I probably would not even pretend to like something I do not feel comfortable in. That dress is my lesson to stay true to myself. All my ‘ex gifts’ are my reminder of something I have learnt about relationships, men or most importantly me. Erasing the past we want to forget our mistakes, failures or broken hearts but throwing away an expensive dress usually does not help your wallet or your self esteem.
QUESTION OF TODAY : DO YOU KEEP OR THROW AWAY?
I have just realised that I left all my imaginary readers hanging :)
A few months ago I told you about the date I went to and I stated that the second date is already arranged. Well, time passed and I totally forgot about my little ‘romance’. It is funny because when I think what went wrong I find it difficult to describe what it is exactly. So, let’s do it in the old fashion and probably a little bit cruel LIST style :
1.NO CONFIDENCE (IMPORTANT, VERY IMPORTANT! If you do not like and can’t even pretend to like yourself how can someone else like you? )
2. BODY LANGUAGE ( If you want to kiss me just do it! I will not be the first to do it. And if you blow the chance twice…No more dates?)
3. Being sorry for being interesting ( Yes, he had a few cocktails and he got tipsy. More tipsy than me haha But we started talking about religion and I love a meaningful discussion. The problem is sending me a long text message with an apology afterwards. What for again?)
3. JUST BEING TOO DIFFERENT ( Conversation is flowing… but I am much more relaxed and silly than he is. Our aura, or whatever it is called, just did not click.)
4. PHYSICAL ATTRACTION (Lesson learnt ! Don’t ever say to me it is not important….Probably this is the main factor that killed it for me, and maybe for him too.)
In the end of the day, I better live my happy, single life than settle down for ‘meh’.
Happy Father’s day! My family is too far away to celebrate it but I wanted to notify it on my blog.
Today was not about appreciating my dad or my family. It was about seeing a friend and understanding that someone you maybe do not know for too long can became close to you. It was about saying thank you and exploring new places, getting lost together and driving back home. I believe that friend becomes a true friend when a special moment finally happens. This drive around the city today helped two people remember what brought them together. A special moment usually happens when you do something or say something. In this case, it was about words. To be honest, it is usually words that make me get to know someone. That moment when you share a secret or express emotions, when you do not talk anymore but when you say something meaningful. It is like standing naked in front of someone and waiting for them not to judge you but understand and support you. Little smile or a nod and you hope it will always stay the same.
Most of the time you grow apart and the moment passes by. Different moment with a different person happens and you are ‘starting’ a new friendship. But with some people it always stays the same and you naturally know when the person nods and when he smiles at you, you are not afraid, you know you will not be judged. This is what a true friend and a true friendship is. No boundaries, timeless.
So yes I am one of those girls…I like freedom,I am addicted to that feeling when you do what you want and you don’t need to discuss it with anyone,when you are in a relationship and you enjoy the feeling that someone loves you so much but you can’t even call it L.O.V.E….I thought I will always stay the same because I kept controlling myself and I still do.However, I always had friends around me and I never set any boundaries.Those friends are the best friends,they are typical to the ones you see in the perfect films : THEY WILL BE HERE FOR YOU NO MATTER WHAT! And then one day one of them starts to follow his dream and goes away..And you support the decision because obviously I am a good friend. And you know what?you know whaaaat?! I want to scream and cry because I feel alone,because I tried to ignore all the feelings and I still got heart broken,because sometimes loosing a friend is much worse than loosing a boyfriend,husband or a lover..
THE QUESTION OF TODAY IS : IS THAT THE SAD PART OF SO CALLED ‘LIFE’?????
I deleted a lot of my old posts and decided to start over.I left the introduction so I can just share my thoughts without any typical bullshit I like to present to the public.
To start with,I went on a date today…And then I started thinking what do we call a ‘date’ ? In the oxford dictionary its definition is : ‘a social or romantic appointment or engagement’. I did not kiss him and he did not kiss me…Seemed to weird even though the conversation went well.So why is it a date? Should not we call this a social appointment (which according to Oxford people is still a DATE) or a friendly meeting?
The place of the ‘appointment’ : A cozy coffee-shop with a cup of cappuccino and an arty crowd around.
The time of the ‘appointment’ : 2 hours
The main topic of the ‘appointment’ : ‘Let’s impress her’
The looks (don’t say it’s not important) : A good style and a red nose..It was cold though!
The impression : He is too talented and too good for me
Soo do I like him? I do and I don’t
Will there be a second date? Already arranged
The question of TODAY is : What do we call a date or what do we call a successful date?
I cant believe that i am actually doing this.I always wanted it but have never known how to start…One wise man encouraged me to stop thinking and just write.So here I am…Trying to show the world how wonderful I am and how interesting my blog will be.You know what!? I actually don’t know what i will be blogging about.Its just so much I want to say.I have different ideas and opinions on so many things around me or inside me that in the end of the day sometimes i cant shut it down.Hopefully this new hobby will help me to solve the problem and figure out who i am..If u ask me how i describe myself …Let’s say lover of life,fashion,art,food,movies,nice songs,long train journeys and challenges which make you feel free over and over again :)
p.s. does everyone in here start their first post being that cheesy or is it just something wrong with me???